Dating is scary
Truth be told, I am afraid of dating rejection. It's not the only thing I am afraid of. It's merely something that I am afraid of that is easy for me to write about. We will discuss my other fears some other time.
My friend's boyfriend asked me if I get asked out all the time. I shocked him by saying that I never get asked out. I am not alone though. My friend Em is the same way. Is it me, or are guys looking for a wounded bird to take care of?
A year ago I went on strike. I decided that I wasn't going to ask anyone out. I decided that maybe, just maybe, someone would ask me out before I turned 30. Around November it actually happened. One guy in a whole year. Not so good. I had a chat with Megan today about putting myself out there and just asking someone out. She thinks it is time (and I now have a homework assignment).That doesn't stop it from being scary. I have trust issues and I don't like sharing (but atleast I am aware of that).
The last last guy I went out with, I met at a party. I decided to go for it because my inner circle of friends is completely tapped out (he was a co-worker of a friend). I either know where the guys have been or they are too young or I am just not interested. I have explored online dating but something about it just doesn't seem right. Besides there is only so much you can really know about a person through there online profile (and its much easier to lie online)
Sure each new person is a learning experience but I would like to avoid getting hurt again. It's definitely getting easier explaining that I am not perfect and that I am a little complicated. The difficulty is trying to communicate that my needs are simple. It seems like most guys see the
fact that I can look after myself and begin to wonder what exactly do I need them for.
My friend Chris is convinced that my independence is a good thing. Most guys probably won't understand that, but some will get the fact that I am looking for someone to compliment my life, not to be my life.
My friend's boyfriend asked me if I get asked out all the time. I shocked him by saying that I never get asked out. I am not alone though. My friend Em is the same way. Is it me, or are guys looking for a wounded bird to take care of?
A year ago I went on strike. I decided that I wasn't going to ask anyone out. I decided that maybe, just maybe, someone would ask me out before I turned 30. Around November it actually happened. One guy in a whole year. Not so good. I had a chat with Megan today about putting myself out there and just asking someone out. She thinks it is time (and I now have a homework assignment).That doesn't stop it from being scary. I have trust issues and I don't like sharing (but atleast I am aware of that).
The last last guy I went out with, I met at a party. I decided to go for it because my inner circle of friends is completely tapped out (he was a co-worker of a friend). I either know where the guys have been or they are too young or I am just not interested. I have explored online dating but something about it just doesn't seem right. Besides there is only so much you can really know about a person through there online profile (and its much easier to lie online)
Sure each new person is a learning experience but I would like to avoid getting hurt again. It's definitely getting easier explaining that I am not perfect and that I am a little complicated. The difficulty is trying to communicate that my needs are simple. It seems like most guys see the
fact that I can look after myself and begin to wonder what exactly do I need them for.
My friend Chris is convinced that my independence is a good thing. Most guys probably won't understand that, but some will get the fact that I am looking for someone to compliment my life, not to be my life.
posted by jen at
9:11 PM
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