Content vs Substance...

So I had a bunch of date related stuff typed up and decided to use Blogger's scheduler to make sure that things got published. This scales back on the spontaneity but it gets content out there on a more frequent basis. Unfortunately, I will have to get back on the dating train to avoid running out of content.

The dating thing was starting to get a little crazy. Part of me was thinking about going on some dates that were bound for disaster just to get a story (ie. dude with 7 cats. BTW. Ask the Arab is about 90% true). I was beginning to feel like one of those crazy tabloid writers that follows Britney and Lindsay around for a story. NOT GOOD. That totally defeats the point behind the exercise.

Even though I have no clue who my readership is I would like to believe that they would appreciate REAL, yet highly entertaining, content. I would also like dates with substance rather than losing precious minutes of my life that I will never get back.

Date #8- Napoleon Dynomite

Date: June 7, 2008
Location: Clay Pit
Time: 6:30pm
Duration of date: 1 hrs 15 min
Occupation: Architect
Age: 28

He emailled me first. He was interested in cooking together (this sounded a little pervy). We emailled about how awesome Cook's Illustrated was. I thought that this dude was a foodie and might be interesting.

So we met for an early dinner at Clay Pit. Dinner was tasty. The company wasn't so great. When he spoke he sounded like Napoleon Dynomite. He was beyond awkward and he was clueless on dining in Austin. He's been in Austin for 3 years and claims that there aren't any restaurants that serve fresh foods (Casa de Luz anyone?). He is not a foodie. A foodie would know that the majority of the good restaurants in town have options for vegetarians on the menu. If not, then they will make you something special.

At least I got my indian food. Dinner ended awkwardly (you know I didn't let this one pay for diner). We hung out after paying but the waitstaff kept staring at us, hoping we were leaving so they could seat more people.

We walked outside and headed to our cars. I was able to finish the date with the "handshake-and-run" approach. I called the Arab and ended up getting margaritas with him and the Jew. That was a much better way to spend an evening.

Our parents had hippys, we have hipsters

So, I've noticed a trend lately in my posts, they are all tending to be about the apathetic sect of our generation that I like to call hipsters.

There is something about that group of people that really annoys me, or at least I pretend to be annoyed by them. I'm not sure if it's because I'm one of them or what. Maybe I'm one of them, but maybe I'm not, anyone have any particular ideas of what totally classifies a hipster?

I've always thought that it was about clothes and being into more indie music than other people. There's some bad connotation too about the apathy, but I'm not sure if that needs to be part of the definition.

Maybe, with all this new-found growth in my life both emotionally and mentally I just need to let that go. I think I need to embrace my being a hipster rather than shun-ing it.

And irregardless of labels and stereotypes, there is more things that the human race has in common than different. So I should probably start working on that. Making more connections, rather than separating people from be based on the clothes they wear or music they listen to.

A few years ago, a now ex-boyfriend and I used to have this argument all the time. Who was more hipster, and somehow it always had bad connotations. Hipsters are dumb, hipsters are sheep, hipsters are apathetic. I'm done with that. I think for me really getting any sort of understanding is going to be found in accepting my station.

What's that proverb, something like "The smartest man knows only himself." I'm not sure who said that or where I've heard that, but it seems fitting for my situation right now.

Date #6 (2nd date)- The Artist

Date: May 24, 2008
Location: His House

So I gave the artist a second chance. I figured that he must be lonely. He doesn't really fit the stalker or the player MO.

We were supposed to go to the museum the week before but he was sick. I went over after dinner with friends. We watched "Four Eyed Monsters" and made out on the couch. This time we were both sober. My shirt came off pretty quickly. He marched me to his bed and more making out.

Once again, the date ended with the sleepover debate. I left. I know the dangers of spooning.

We kept in touch for a little while. His phone is frequently cut off and he has disappeared a few times. He popped up later on MySpace but I didn't respond.

Date #6 - The artist

Date: May 9, 2008
Location: His House
Time: 9:30pm
Duration of date: ~6 hrs
Occupation: Restaurant/Artist
Age: 35

I'd actually been emailling this dude through FastCupid (his on the Onion Personals) since February. It started with talk of a game of truth or dare. We talked on the phone a few times. He was really sweet. Then he disappeared for a month. He had a family emergency. Then he popped up again and wanted to hang out.

Based on the fact that he was an artist and worked in a restaurant (and the dirty email and phone conversations) I figured that he would be a pretty easy NSA target.

So, I went to his house at 9:30 on a Friday (my first non-weeknight date). We talked. We drank some wine on his front porch out of Styrofoam cups (he just moved in). I could tell that he had had a head start in the drinking dept. I wasn't sure how much though. He called me out for being uncomfortable around him. He asked why I couldn't look him in the eye.

We talked about tattoos. When I said that I didn't have any, he said that he would draw one for me and he traced the place on my arm where he thought it should go. A little spooky but I fell for it. We went inside. We danced in the living room. We ended up on the couch and we sat and talked with his head in my lap. We laughed at the many drunk phone calls that M made to me that night.

We ended up making out on the couch. All of a sudden, he's telling me that I am beautiful. Anyways, we talk some more then I end up on his bed (clothes still on, I am not Megan). We listen to music and continue making out. Things progress, we fooled around a bit, I somehow ended up topless and we debated having sex. He said that he wasn't goingto have sex with me. (part of me trusted him, part of me didn't). He actually kept his word.

Then things got a little weird. In between the fooling around, he told me that he was starting to fall for me. He held me and we end up spooning and I almost fell asleep there. Then I told him that I needed to go home. I needed to sleep in my bed. He told me that I should stay and fall asleep with him. It was late and I shouldn't drive home (no worries, I was sober). He told me to call or text him when I got home. (this was around 4am).

Part of me wanted to stay. Its been over a year since anyone has paid that kind of attention to me. Part of me wanted to run the hell out of there and never come back. I ended up leaving (I made sure that I didn't leave anything there).

He sent me 2 text messages the next day. The first said good morning. The second was sent an hour later with a "?" I guess he was hoping that I would call. I told him last night that I was busy this weekend. I blew him off today. I am not sure if/when I will call back.

I am mildly attracted to him. I have a feeling the sex would be good. But I don't see him getting along with my friends or anything long term. So far, only the grad student seems to fit that description.

I wasn't sure what do do about this dude. M thought that he may be the scary stalker type. The Arab said to run away. Keely said to give the guy a second chance.

Date #3- Film Boy

Date: March 26, 2008
Location: Flight Path
Time: 8:00pm
Duration of date: 2 hrs 30 mins
Occupation: Film Maker
Age: 27

He found me on FastCupid (he is on the Onion Personals). He googled me and found my blog and he decided that he wanted to meet me. He was volunteering for SXSW and wanted to know if I wanted to meet up then. We sent a few text messages back and forth but never met up during the festival. Then I got the ear infection from hell. A few weeks later we arranged to meet up at Flight Path on a Wednesday (non-committal date night).

He did most of the questioning (pretty common when I am not really interested in the dude). We talked movies and music. He asked me out my job. I barely remember the date. That is how uneventful it was.

He walked me to my car. The date ended in the standard awkward hug.

Dating Advice from the Arab #5

Dear Arab-
Would it be a good idea to go out with a dude with 7 cats? he just got out of a long-term relationship a week ago and claims that it was over long ago (she is in the process of moving out). We've been emailing back and forth and he doesn't appear to be that damaged.

curious kitten

Kitty-
Never date a guy who's number of cats is larger than the number of women with whom he's slept.

Let's assume, for the sake of argument, that he's slept with 8 women. It's probably also safe to assume he accumulated the cats though his relationship with the ex. If he still has the cats, then he's not over his ex. Do you really want to date a guy who's not over his ex? You will end up in one of the following two situations: a really needy guy who can't do anything by himself or a lot of meaningless sex. Figure out which situation this will be. If your OK with the predicted outcome, then go for it. If you do go for it, make sure to close the bedroom door or be prepared to deal with claws on your back.
-The Arab

Gentrification = loss of character?

So today I went shopping. I was trying to go to ace mart with Mikey to help him get some new stuff for his kitchen, but it was closed. Not just closed for the day but closed for good. I think because the location was too valuable for the up and coming condos here.

After we didn't get to go shopping for fun kitchen stuff we went to for tacos at torchy's. The best tex-mex tacos in Austin, BTW. Then he had to go meet Kim. Ok cool I had an afternoon to kill, that's a very appealing thing to me. It's been awhile since I've had the time to just lolly-gag around town.

I first went down to Parts & Labor. A little boutique favorite of mine here in town. They always have some cool local designer stuff. I'm particularly fond of the jewelry there.

Being down on south congress just reminded me of the gentrification that's going on all over town. Now I'm all for making stuff nicer and newer, but I'm beginning to realize the cost of it on the original character of the city.

It reminded me of the old Factory People. I used to love that place, you could always find something unique and couture over there, but because of gentrification it's gone now. Now it's an American Apparel (Blech!), filled with florescent lights and uniform clothes with no character.

Then I went down to that 2nd street district. Octane used to be over there but they couldn't afford to keep the lease. That was my favorite store in Austin. I used to buy all my James Perse there. Now I have to buy his stuff online. It's kinda depressing.

So I decided to just walk around the block and check out what was there now. Nothing. There's some other boutiques there, but nothing that fills the void of Octane. Every other store in that area is designed to make everyone look the same, with racks and racks of the same stuff.

This all made me think of Kiki Nass too. That place closed a few months ago, and now a skateboard/clothing shop is there also with racks and racks of the same stuff. Granted, it probably wasn't in the best location for business, but I often made a trip out of my way to check out her new stuff.

Can anyone tell me what happened to all the awesome little boutiques in town? Am I just stuck dressing like every other girl here in town now? How sad is that? :(

Date #1 - Nature boy

Date: January 13, 2008
Location: Draught House
Time: 7pm
Duration of date: 2 hrs 15 mins
Occupation: Grad Student
Age: 29

First of all, I wasn't physically attracted to him. He has a Conan O'Brien face (you know, where everything is in the middle of the face). It didn't help that I was totally distracted by the hot dude that was sitting at the table next to us. I will now admit that I am still trying to get over my hot Ryan thing. I need to lower the bar if I am ever going to date someone again.

Not bad. I had one beer, he had 2. I think I did most of the talking and he asked more questions. I was trying to avoid being the interrogator. Besides, I had no real desire to get into his pants so I didn't have to ask as many questions (Meg's prerequisite).

We chatted about school, bikes, stormwater and wetlands (he mentioned something about birdwatching), cats, the Drafthouse, the internet, and how music is reaching broader audiences because of the internet making music more accessible.

One interesting question was, "how did I get into online dating?". I told him about M and Meg's summer of fun on Nerve.com. I told him that I came into a lot of points on Nerve because they deleted my profile and I was compensated with 3000 points and I finally decided to use them before they were taken away. He used to be part of the FastCupid service through the Chronicle but now he is on the Onion personals. He asked why I chose him to go out with (let me count the ways: non-smoker,older than my little sister, that didn't appear to be a complete d-bag
with 2 kitties was very appealing) and I said that his profile looked good and having cats is a big plus in my book.

The date ended with a handshake.

The next day he emailled to thank me for meeting up with him and he apologized for not conveying all the charm and sense of humor of which he is capable of. He hoped that I felt my time was well spent. He asked me out for lunch. I had scheduling conflicts. Lunch never happened and he was never heard from again.

Finally, I'm Smart

Yesterday after school Matty and I went to the Blanton for a members only showing of the printmaking galleries.

I believe it was really one of the first times in my life that I actually felt smart. It's not that I feel dumb most of the time or anything, just yesterday I knew the prints we saw and for the first time in real life had something intelligent to say about them.

Matty was impressed. Hell, I was impressed with how much I actually retained from my art history class. It was pretty freakin' rad. It really me realize how much I will eventually end up getting out of school.

It's a new feeling too, maybe that's the other reason why I like it so much. Well whatever it is, I'm not going to question it right now. It was awesome. So if anyone has any art questions, I'm here for ya!

"Shopping" at Whole Foods

I happened upon this ad on CL m4w:

I want a chick that shops at Whole Foods. I've noticed that there are a lot of hot women there (mostly; see attached graph). Since Whole Foods is also flipping expensive, then that means the single women there are banking it somehow, which is good. Or they're living beyond their means (bad), but that's pretty easy to figure out.

M, the Arab, and I have been discussing the hotness factor at Whole Foods. The customers, the employees, so many hotties. We plan on going "shopping" one of these days. The people that tend to shop there still work out, they give a damn about what they put into their bodies, and they can afford to shop there (we think).

The game plan: Go to Whole Foods, see if we can get some numbers. if we come up empty handed we can always go the missed connections route. Apparently a lot of people do it based on the number of Missed Connections on Craigslist.

Stay tuned for the results of our shopping trip.

Date #5- Speed Racer

Date: April 16, 2008
Location: Opal Divine's
Time: 7:30pm
Duration of date: 2 hrs 30 mins
Occupation: Race Car Driver/Musician/Auto Mechanic
Age: 29

I met him on the internet. We talked about where we grew up. Apparently he has a degree in Environmental Sciences and made an attempt to get into the industry. He ended up working as a mechanic and never went back. We talked about how Austin has changed over the years. He is a musician so we talked about that for awhile. He asked a lot of questions. I didn't ask that many (I was interested but the 2 beers were kicking in. It was about that time when I started thinking about the illusive grad student. I couldn't even think about making out with this dude). He owns his house. He has a cat (all good things).

Towards the end of the date, he shifted the discussion to online dating. I explained the difficulties of meeting people when you don't leave the house. Apparently he doesn't get out much either.

The date ended awkwardly with a handshake in the parking lot.

Later, I realized later that I didn't have his number but he had mine. I never heard from him.

I stalked him on the internet later. His band wasn't that great.

Flickr fun

I like pretty things, we all like pretty things, right?
Well my cousin did this on her blog, and I dig it. So I thought I'd do the same.

Rules:
a. Type your answer to each of the questions below into Flickr Search.
b. Using only the first page, pick an image.
c. Copy and paste each of the URLs for the images into Big Huge Lab's mosaic maker.

Questions:
1. What is your first name? Emily
2. What is your favorite food? Rice
3. What high school did you go to? Oak Park River Forest
4. What is your favorite color? Green
5. Who is your celebrity crush? Milo Ventimiglia
6. Favorite drink? Dr. Pepper
7. Dream vacation? Spain
8. Favorite dessert? Creme Brulee
9. What you want to be when you grow up? I don't know
10. What do you love most in life? Diesel
11. One Word to describe you. Stubborn
12. Your flickr name. Limorama



1. BSS - Amy Millan, Emily Haines, Leslie Feist_1962, 2. Rice Paddy, 3. Red Eyes in Paradise, 4. c’mon, get me if you can…♫ a praying mantis from bali ♫, 5. Milo Ventimiglia, 6. Drink Dr. Pepper!, 7. Mallorca 2007 -- Waiting for summer (Part 2), 8. Crème Brulée, 9. Perhentian Island, Terengganu, Malaysia (Poem - Clouds Amaze Me), 10. Tanke, 11. a stubborn guy, 12. Hello There: Emily Petersen

Challenge Update #3

So I decided to take the plunge and start posting the entries on the 17. I know I said that I would wait until the end of the project but I figured that reaching the halfway point in July was a pretty big accomplishment. Internet worthy even. Especially since I did it by only counting one date per person.

I hit a plateau not too long ago and it reminded me why I set out on this journey in the first place. I did it to work out some personal issues. I've built this giant wall around myself and I knew that in order to grow as a person I really need to let people in. I had to learn how to share and trust in order to lighten that emotional load. I think that I've got it down to one of those little train cases.

Date #2 - Mystery Date

Date: February 20, 2008
Location: His House
Time: 8:15pm
Duration of date: 2 hrs 15 mins
Occupation: Media/Design/Web Marketing?
Age: 35

This guy sent me a random message on MySpace. He had seen my profile and thought that I was interesting. He just come off of a nine-month trip to South America. After checking his profile out I told him that I wouldn't mind hearing about his trip over a beer.

I set up a beer date for Wednesday evening (non-committal date night). When I called he had just come back from a run and didn't really feel like being out. He said that I was welcome to come over.

I ended up going over there (I've seen "To Catch a Predator" and I did it anyway). We talked for a long time. The discussion was on politics, our families, a lot of random stuff. We talked about how the subject of race was brought out into the spotlight with the recent presidential debates. He asked some weird questions. He asked when the last time I had a boyfriend was and had I ever lived with a boyfriend. When I answered that it had been over 2 years since I had a boyfriend he asked if I had kept a lover in the interim.

SCARY DUDE. These are not first date questions. I was also a little weirded out when he threw in the "you are more beautiful than I had expected."

Something was a little off about this guy. He was definitely ADD.

The date ended with an awkward hug. I never heard from him again.

Why I should be your date to the Rilo Kiley Show...

This was my response to a M4W ad on Craigslist. I didn't get the invite to Rilo Kiley but I figured that I would pass this on...

This year I am making an effort to meet new people so I will give this a
shot.

The obvious reason that you should pick me is because I am tall. You
wouldn't have to worry about me being able to see in the crowd. Another
advantage is that I stand out in a crowd. If you had to leave to use the
restroom or get beer you could spot me easily, saving your spot (I thought
about going to see Rilo Kiley but I didn't want to pay that much to go to
a show at Stubb's alone. Besides, who would hold my space in the crowd if
I had to get beer or use the restroom?).

More reasons you should pick me:
I always bring an extra set of earplugs (you never know when you need
them). I also have a whole host of items in my purse which could come in
handy (in case of medical emergency or Macgyver-type situation). I am not
one of those annoying people who attempts to capture a show on their
camera phone. I am low maintenance. You will never catch me in
impractical footwear (in case we need to make a run for it). If you
haven't already discovered them, I could point you in the direction of a
very tasty truffle oil grilled cheese sandwich.

For more reasons why you should take me to Rilo Kiley, feel free to email
me, or check out my myspace page.

Dating advice from the Arab #4

So dear Arab,

Why do guys express interest to the point of giving us things and making
out with us, then just disappear into thin air? What's up with that?

-Left Wondering




Dear Left Wondering,

I'll give you two answers and let you pick which one fits this situation best.

Answer 1:
Guys are a lot like cats. When you dangle a string in front of a cat, he
may look at it, but if you don't move it, he'll loose interest really
quickly. The best way to keep the cat interested in the string is to
dangle it right in front of him and yank it just out of reach whenever he
tries to grab it. So, in this simile, you are like the string. If you
want to keep the guy interested, you need to pull yourself just out of
reach whenever he thinks he's getting you. Of course, if you play this
game too long, the guy will get frustrated and give up.

Answer 2:
You might be thinking about this way too much. This is a really busy time
of year for some people. It's possible he's working long hours, traveling,
or dealing with some other personal issues that are taking up a lot of his
time. Wait a week or two to see if things calm down for him. If it seems
he's never going to have free time, then you move on and find someone who
can give you the attention you deserve.

-The Arab

Hipsters in Space

Found this today, It goes along with the "Texting Your Way to Love". I'm really into these little cartoons, they make me feel better. :)

Do you blog on the first date?

I attended a panel at SXSW on this topic last year.

They discussed the pros, the cons. Anonymity. Protect yourself. Protect the people you date. Do you tell people that you date that you may or may not blog about it? Will they be offended for being included (or left out)? What if they stumble upon your blog? Will they change their mind about you?

Eventually people find out about your blog. One of these days it will come back to bite me in the ass (the time delay can only do do much). I guess I will cross that bridge when I get there.

Dating advice from the Arab #3

Dear Arab-

I just met this guy. We we've only gone on one date. I am mildly attracted to him. I have a feeling the sex would be good. But I don't see him getting along with my friends or anything long term.

-longtermlover

Dear longtermlover
The bottom line is you should trust your instincts. If you don't think you can see yourself with him for at least six months, they why go though the trouble of a second date? Unless of course you really just want some sex. That's not necessarily a bad thing, and no one should think any less of you for it. Just be honest with yourself.

-The Arab

We were not meant to see the fireworks this year

So yesterday was the fourth of July. I neglected to make plans(some-part in hopes that a dude would pop up in my life, but eh). So the only other person who didn't have plans already was Lee.

I was cool with that, he's a pretty cool dude and we're buds. We wanted to light some stuff on fire. Sounds all good right? Well it didn't work out that way.

We left my house on our bicycles to ride down to the fireworks at auditorium shores. We had a backpack full of beer and a blanket. It was super hot out so I decided to wear a skirt b/c the only shorts I own were wet from after my earlier swim workout.

Every thing's fine, we're just riding along then when we get to the bridge at I35, my front fork gets caught on Lee's back Axel. (on his quick release) So I went down hard, over the bars, hit my tooth on the curb, and f-ed up my left wrist.

Now I am a pirate with half a right front tooth. And I hear it'll be about 300 to get it fixed. Yuck. I'll live, it just feels weird in my mouth (till I get it fixed.)

It's either time for an intervention or a trip to the plex.

So yeah, I did it today. I broke three of my vibrators. It wasn't like I over use them or anything, I think it was just time for them to go to that special vibrator heaven in the sky. In fairness, they were well loved, well used and I have had them each for a little while now.

The one I'm most upset about was the audi-oh that broke today. I really liked that one. It was unassuming, and well, pretty damn fun. See it works fine, it's just the little bullet that broke. I looked around online for a little but don't think I can find a replacement part, boo. If anyone knows where to find one, please point me in the right direction. I'm thinking I may have to look somewhere other than in sex-toy shops.

The other two, well they were old stand-bys. I haven't used them in a while so I didn't really expect them to still work. When the audi-oh broke, I went to old faithful... not so faithful today. To make matters worse, the other stand-by broke too. Just my luck, I guess it's karma coming back to bite me in the ass.

So the long and short of it is that I think I'm going to develop carpal tunnel syndrome if we don't make it down south real soon. Ladies let me know when you wanna make that trip to the plex.